Tuesday 19 February 2008

The End of Day 1

Well its fast approaching the end of day 1, of my little experiment. Work was surprisingly easy and I managed to stay away from Facebook, msn, skype or any form of time wasting site or service.

I realized that if I could keep this up for long enough I may actually get a lot of shit done.

Self control never came easily to me as a child, teenager or an adult, though how I managed to kick a 20 a day smoking habit, I don't know.

I realised today that I DONT NEED facebook, my life functioned just fine with out it before, infact I used to have loads more fun and get up to all sorts of stuff before.

As the years have gone on, I have relied more and more on msn messenger, myspace, gdar, and other internet chat sites ans services to feed my desire for human interaction.

It has to be said that nothing beats good old fashioned face to face connections.

I also got to think about the things I do'nt do any more; ask you self these simple questions;

1. When was the last time you just sat and read at home, and by read, I mean a real book and not a glossy mag, the news paper or some article on the internet, a real book with real pages, something to exercise that brain, get it to churn and listen and learn, I mean kicked back, turn the TV and computer off and sat back and relaxed and read..? maybe never?

2. When did you last sit back and just listen to music, just lie down and look at the cieling and think about your life, your hopes and dreams, make plans and sing.

3. When did you just pick up the phone and call you friends and arrange something over the phone, instead of sending a text message, an email, or a facebook meeting request.

4. When did you last just go for a walk, just to go for a walk and clear your mind.

All these things you may do or may not do, but I feel that because of my constant "ON STATE" my constant connection to this here system that I am connecting to, you through, I have become a drone.

I sat at my computer the other night, trying to work, trying to get on with some personal project and I just couldn't, it was like there was some kind of dull fuzz, an interference, if you will, that was blocking me. I think I understand what it is now.

It is the constant drip drip drip, of the facebook mini-feed, of the new emails, the new posts on myspace, the drip drip of messages from the meaningless "friends" on msn messenger, that pose as a constant and continuous distraction from every day life, and its array of necessary tasks.

This interference pattern may not occur in all of us, but I do believe that a vast majority of us are very prone to these addictive patterns. It is definitely why gambling, drug addiction, debt and all the other social diseases, we have today have become so rampant in our society.

People are over whelmed with stimuli that it creates this interference pattern in the brain.

I don't know if I will go back to facebook , how I feel after today, I am not sure I will ever use it again, I feel like someone told me a terrible secret and it struck fear in me so deep that I woke up as if from a terrible nightmare, with a huge intake of breath and a cold sweat on my brow.

Only time will tell, but for the moment, it is only day 1 and I do not want to get ahead of my self.

Drip, Drip, Drip I can hear the call of a distant RSS feed, and mini-feed, a message board, the drip, drip, drip of information, slowing calling, longing for my minds connection.

Connect with the drip, drip, drip and soon you will see how the hands on your watch begin to speed up, and faster and faster before the night is gone.

Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, as each week flies by, day after day rolling over and over, as the sands of your own personal sand timer begin to speed up, ask your self? Does this connection serve me? Does it add to my life? Or is it sapping my life?

Think, read, write and create, the only forces against the interference, the only way to block it out and stop the consumption and dull muffled overwhelming battle from with-in.

2 comments:

Vee. said...

Hey, you are so clear and focused! THIs is exactly the feelings one gets if one really is honest about sitting in front of this machine day in and day out!! Wow Robbie make sure you get through day 2-we will be watching and willing you on! XXX

Anonymous said...

I deactivated my facebook today because it is true, we spend so much time sitting there, "interacting" we forget to see each other, day in and day out face to face rather than writing on peoples walls. Good luck